Well let me tell you a story ... always wanted to present Jackanory! Anyhow ... Let me explain the last entry.
Goliaths Googlies ~ my mum, Hannibal Lecter style, enjoys delicacies which you and I would run screaming from. On this one occasion, she brought home ... well to put it delicately I believe they are called sweetbread ... They didn't look too sweet to me. Suffice to say she cooks them up with great drama while Dad winced and the whole family refused to eat them. Goliath later that day came downstairs, going commando and his family jewels happened to catch Dads eye ... "You better put those away son ... if your mum sees them she'll be cooking them too!"
You will be happy to know that Goliaths googlies were rescued from mum. If you need proof ... may I point out that Goliath and Dejanari are soon to be parents!!
The Sex Machine ~ another my mum story .. A prospective suitor for my hand approached my mum and asked to see me. I refused to even consider being paraded around ... I was a bit of a feminist you know ... until I knew enough information about him. So mum tottered away, phoned the prospectives, spent half an hour on the phone, came back and sat down. "They will be round on Tuesday." I scream at mum ... "You don't know anything about him, mum ... he could be an axe-murderer ... Do you even know what he does for a living?" Wait for it ... It is a classic .... She replies, in front of the whole family and with no idea of what she is actually saying .... "He's a sex machine!"
The prospectives had mentioned that he ran a firm selling fax machines ... easy mistake to make mum. But you got be proud of a mum who thinks of her daughters happiness!
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2 comments:
Jackanory my arse....Vertigo here & she's cross, very, very cross. Recog Xzsara cheated at exams at school...make sure she doesn't sit to closely to you. She won't be staring lovingly into your eyes, she'll be sapping the ideas from your brain.
Last time I tell her about my publishing ambitions. Give her some credit though the stories are true and very eloquently written...but still my idea!
Anyway been consoling myself with smacking the penguin. No vertigo is no pervert..its the game the little sis has been playing. I've imagined she's the penguin and have beaten her record already....593.5.......
Try the seal bounce, another yeti game...absolutely fab and the record to beat is 460.3
Match your 593.5 ... http://www.yetisports.org/ ... brilliant site .. now playing orca slap ....
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