Lawnmower Man needs a haircut.

We decided that while the weather was good we would tackle the garden ... it has been seriously neglected since I fell pregnant ... and Cream felt unable to tend to it .. to be fair he was tending to me a lot and has admitted that he wouldn't know the difference between the weeds and flowers.

So after almost a year of neglect we decided that the lawn would be the easiest thing to tackle and we took turns with the mower and in entertaining Zoo. Cream finished the main lawn and I suggested that the wild area near the shed needed sorting out. Cream clambered in ... whilst I shouted to him that perhaps it just needed a trim round the outside, he waded in with mower blaring. At one point I lost sight of him but I could still see the mower's cable twisting in all directions until I heard a loud pop ... "It's ok .. just found our tennis ball" he yelled as he threw out a green mangled object. "Cream ... why don't you ..." My voice is drowned out by the noise of the mower and Cream dived straight back in again. A couple of seconds pass and there was another loud pop .. all went quiet.

"You've run over the cable haven't you?" "No, no, no ... there is just so much stuff in here." "Ok ... well use the strimmer then." A lot of muttering and swearing is heard and he finally concedes. Five minutes later he decides to give it a final combover with the mower and is surprised that it won't work. Sure enough he had cut the cable clean in two and had been prancing around a live wire!!

The garden was not the only thing in need of a restyling ... Cream has been growing his hair and his head is a bundle of beautiful curls .. not that you would know as he has it hidden under a woolly hat because he doesn't like it! Finally managed to convince him to leave the woolly at home to attend Visa and Vertigo's BBQ and no-one recognised him!! Dejanari did comment that he looked like a cherub! Managed to buy him a summer hat to replace the woollies so you may see more of the amazing curls this summer.

He should consider himself lucky .. if he had managed to electrocute himself his hair would have been even curlier!!!

Poetry in motion?

I am almost 35 years old .. blimey time flies. Vertigo has already asked me what I wanted and a small unambitious wishlist has been provided (no self assembly BBQ's this year appear on the list!)

All the reminiscing reminded me of the poetry I used to writealmost twenty years ago now, usually at three in the morning when I was unable to sleep. A variety of subjects but one that seems pertinent today ... Goliath has not been heard of for a while so it may well be that this poetry reflects the torment he is currently going through!??


PRESENT PICKING

That time of year is coming near
When the dreaded task is always asked
Presents must be bought
Cards must be selected
Nothing worse than to be caught
Empty-handed and left dejected
But what to buy
I hear you cry
Flowers, jewellery or ornamental trees
Something original which will definitely please
A tiger cub or a bedroom suite
Just make sure it's not something to eat
Oh my friend I'm going through hell
Anything will do I hear you yell
But what could I buy
That could possibly satisfy
The exquisite taste
With which I am faced?
No my dear I'm sorry to say
But the present will have to wait for another day!

May just have to torment you all with further clippings from my blue period!

It's March?? Where did February go??

Just to confirm that I am still here .. for those of you who need proof .. take a look at the latest satellite pictures from space. The two large spherical objects that have appeared recently in NW London ... that will be my bosom! Zoo does seem to be rather attached to me at present and whilst we are trying desperately to get him to sleep in his own cot for any period of time ... he seems to have taken advice from the cats and refuses point blank to sleep in his own bed and insists on sharing ours.